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Late Blooms

Now I know personally unfortunately how it feels to be that tree.

That tree mid-field without even a trace of an embryonic leaf

Why couldn’t I just be chopped with an axe so everyone can see that none of this unproductiveness is my fault. Good grief!

Bony branches all stretched out not proud, but feeling really bad

6 days into May & missing Springs’ opening parade is pretty sad!

With zero to offer, just rooted uselessly; absolutely nothing to add.

I’ve been thrown into the wrong season and would truly like to know the reason

I’m being torn from my chosen field! This is such a rotten deal!

Literally out-standing in my field, but ‘imposter syndrome’ is real!

I’ve got nothing to produce and trying to explain myself is no use

No assurance and no proof that I won’t just be let go & cut loose!

Standing bravely out in the cold last season seemed cool.

But it’s a new season entirely, now I feel like such a fool!

Missed a chance for a grand or even an affordable entrance.

Standing barren while surrounded by bud-filled buddies.

These lucky trees know they’re all decked out to please

With their sheltering shade taken when it's 80 degrees.

Productive service is part and parcel of all essential jobs

How can I reconcile this phase, this unproductive pause?

There is no way to fix it. There is no way to pretend.

People pass by but do not question my other tree friends.

Only me.

"Hmm…Where could your cute little leaf buds be?”

Now you ask? After refusing to invest in the whole neighborhood

Now you wonder why things, for some, are not looking so good.

Oh, you’re not being unkind; just noting that I am lagging behind

Kind of worried I can’t contribute to the economy / environment?

It’s not clear to you how I could’ve ended up in this predicament!

Classism, sexism, wage theft, no labour reps, under-employment

With zero cash flow no interest grows; it’s all spent on the rent!

My arms spread out empty like that leafless tree for all to see

Gone is the season of the stable job where I might get paid fairly

Now I’m vulnerable with no paid sick days, and open to precarity

Every aspect of my self-esteem is like a leaf either dying or dead

Other trees on the lot have been warning that this might spread

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